1 00:00:30,410 --> 00:00:32,590 Why does love exist if it hurts so much? does? 2 00:00:33,170 --> 00:00:35,730 Why is everything over before it? started? 3 00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:39,330 Holger, I know that I will never love you will see you again. 4 00:00:39,730 --> 00:00:42,270 What am I supposed to do? It's all like that pointless. 5 00:00:44,690 --> 00:00:46,510 What should I write in my diary? 6 00:00:47,170 --> 00:00:48,170 November 20th. 7 00:00:48,550 --> 00:00:51,770 I have lost what was mine before was the most important thing in the world. 8 00:00:52,090 --> 00:00:54,130 I am 17 years old and unhappy. 9 00:00:54,630 --> 00:00:55,910 What else should I write? 10 00:00:56,370 --> 00:00:57,810 It's so pointless. 11 00:01:01,770 --> 00:01:04,030 What this love has given us 12 00:01:04,769 --> 00:01:11,770 what they made of our lives, the Answer, when will she give us 13 00:01:11,770 --> 00:01:12,770 then achieve? 14 00:01:17,070 --> 00:01:23,050 The caresses of the embrace, pain 15 00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:29,450 bitter experience, memory of it she will leave us. 16 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:47,550 Young Love, you're lucky for us given. 17 00:01:50,950 --> 00:01:52,090 hot love, 18 00:01:53,110 --> 00:01:56,430 the desire to experience you again. 19 00:01:59,310 --> 00:02:00,510 Young Love, 20 00:02:01,250 --> 00:02:04,570 the bond of love is the resentment. 21 00:02:07,550 --> 00:02:08,690 Hot Love. 22 00:02:09,870 --> 00:02:12,570 because we both have to separate. 23 00:02:15,530 --> 00:02:22,270 The hope that lived in us, that Happiness after you 24 00:02:22,270 --> 00:02:27,470 so striving is through our fault everything has now melted away. 25 00:02:29,030 --> 00:02:35,850 The love we are committed to. 26 00:02:36,830 --> 00:02:40,150 What remained of her at the end? 27 00:02:40,450 --> 00:02:43,830 It was over as soon as it began. 28 00:02:57,250 --> 00:03:02,250 Young love, you are so lucky for us given. 29 00:03:07,149 --> 00:03:11,050 Hatela, the desire to see you again experience. 30 00:03:14,650 --> 00:03:15,650 Janela, 31 00:03:16,250 --> 00:03:17,910 the bond of love... 12. 32 00:03:18,350 --> 00:03:19,510 March, Sunday. 33 00:03:20,130 --> 00:03:22,690 I don't know if I'm laughing or serious should be. 34 00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:25,510 Everything was a little strange today Tomorrow. 35 00:03:26,010 --> 00:03:28,490 I didn't want to be with anyone at the moment talk about it. 36 00:03:28,990 --> 00:03:32,230 But for you, dear diary, I can entrust. 37 00:08:07,850 --> 00:08:09,730 Good luck to you. That's okay, I'm coming same. 38 00:08:23,950 --> 00:08:26,630 I don't know if I dreamed something have and what it was. 39 00:08:26,990 --> 00:08:29,530 I have this weird tingling sensation woke up. 40 00:08:29,950 --> 00:08:32,650 This tingling feeling that I've had several times felt. 41 00:08:33,210 --> 00:08:35,730 For the first time, I can remember exactly remember. 42 00:08:36,110 --> 00:08:38,510 I got it in gym class Climbing pole noticed. 43 00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:41,409 Then it kept coming back, especially on Tomorrow. 44 00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:46,290 And although it is such a pleasant feeling I didn't dare do it myself 45 00:08:46,290 --> 00:08:47,890 awaken. Til today. 46 00:08:48,410 --> 00:08:49,670 Was that right? 47 00:08:57,290 --> 00:09:03,770 If the stupid referee... If a penalty had been given, HSV would have 2 48 00:09:03,770 --> 00:09:05,130 won. Shit! 49 00:09:05,470 --> 00:09:07,730 Now he is back up in the table 5th place. 50 00:09:07,950 --> 00:09:10,450 You always have to on Sundays at breakfast read the newspaper? 51 00:09:11,410 --> 00:09:14,850 You know exactly that I am on the weekend can't do without two things. 52 00:09:15,170 --> 00:09:18,110 To the sports show and that Football reports in the newspaper. 53 00:09:18,790 --> 00:09:20,610 Otherwise I do everything the family does wants. 54 00:09:21,110 --> 00:09:23,950 By the way, your daughter is... Breakfast hasn't shown up yet. 55 00:09:24,350 --> 00:09:26,150 So I can still read the newspaper. 56 00:09:26,910 --> 00:09:27,910 Dickhead! 57 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:42,740 Here, my landlord. 58 00:09:42,980 --> 00:09:43,980 Thanks. 59 00:09:47,540 --> 00:09:48,540 Morning, Pat. 60 00:09:49,100 --> 00:09:53,060 That you finally got out of bed are you? Morning, mom. Morning. One will 61 00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:54,800 But sleep longer on Sundays allowed. 62 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:56,720 Hey, hey, sorry. 63 00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:58,199 It's nothing. 64 00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:00,180 But otherwise you are always the one First at breakfast. 65 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,060 Yes. Thanks. 66 00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:06,260 You were there last night in bed by 10 a.m. 67 00:10:06,460 --> 00:10:09,300 For once you even got it Late film omitted. 68 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:13,360 Well I can tell you, that was one force. You would have seen Christopher Lee 69 00:10:13,360 --> 00:10:14,800 should. He was overwhelming. 70 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:18,980 I almost believed, Pope and Mom saw right through me when they saw me like that 71 00:10:18,980 --> 00:10:19,980 have viewed. 72 00:10:20,100 --> 00:10:22,760 I was almost certain that this was the case can't notice something. 73 00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:25,600 It's the bad conscience that drives you unsettled. 74 00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:27,140 What nonsense. 75 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:28,440 Guilty conscience. 76 00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:31,740 You do something like this secretly. About this You don't talk about things. 77 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,420 It's all shit. 78 00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:37,740 I'm somehow happy though. 79 00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:40,480 I've been cumming a lot since this morning freer. 80 00:10:41,100 --> 00:10:43,620 Maybe I can feel this way too don't describe it at all. 81 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:47,000 And maybe that’s not what happiness is correct word. 82 00:10:47,860 --> 00:10:50,560 Outside my window on the street goes a blind man. 83 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:52,560 He's definitely unhappy. 84 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,900 Maybe he's never been able to see. 85 00:10:55,380 --> 00:10:57,320 But he can feel, like me too. 86 00:10:58,080 --> 00:10:59,540 Is that perfect? 87 00:11:01,460 --> 00:11:03,820 There are so many things I don't know yet white. 88 00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:07,360 But you probably still can at 15 don't know everything. 89 00:11:08,540 --> 00:11:10,180 Yes, I'm happy. 90 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:14,280 I feel like I'm closed today life started. 91 00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:21,280 Damn, what's the point of this bad thing? Conscience? 92 00:11:26,100 --> 00:11:29,920 Why have a guilty conscience? You you had an orgasm. That is 93 00:11:30,100 --> 00:11:34,380 I also know that I have one had an orgasm. But that's the point 94 00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:38,600 not. I'm just annoyed that I yesterday all day in circles 95 00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:42,920 have. This is nonsense. You have to break the habit. You should finally come with me 96 00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:45,160 sleeping with a boy. That helps one whole lot. 97 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:51,059 Monday, 13th 98 00:11:51,060 --> 00:11:54,500 March. During the school break I have myself with Ellen, my class friend, 99 00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:58,840 entertain. She finds my thoughts silly. Since when are thoughts stupid? 100 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:02,900 Ellen is also a year older. She definitely has a lot of experience in 101 00:12:02,900 --> 00:12:03,900 these things. 102 00:12:05,360 --> 00:12:06,360 Are you crazy? 103 00:12:06,680 --> 00:12:07,680 Not so loud. 104 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:10,000 What's that supposed to mean? 105 00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:21,960 I only mean well to you. You will see. Everything is much easier afterwards. 106 00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,260 Please don't. I do not want that. But was? 107 00:12:24,980 --> 00:12:26,600 This will definitely do you good. 108 00:12:53,150 --> 00:12:57,270 Please, Ellen, stop. Come on, sit down. I want to see your fat little one. You need to 109 00:12:57,270 --> 00:12:58,270 be very relaxed. 110 00:13:26,220 --> 00:13:27,220 Now I'm waiting too. 111 00:15:08,930 --> 00:15:09,930 Come on, 112 00:15:13,630 --> 00:15:14,630 come up. 113 00:15:17,510 --> 00:15:19,030 I'm so horny for you. 114 00:15:36,110 --> 00:15:38,170 I can not help it. I have to. 115 00:15:41,390 --> 00:15:44,910 Oh, that feels good. 116 00:15:46,110 --> 00:15:48,490 Every time I'm full, it works going on with me. 117 00:15:51,290 --> 00:15:52,390 Do it too. 118 00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:53,710 No, I can't. 119 00:16:20,010 --> 00:16:21,190 good as an orgasm. 120 00:16:25,710 --> 00:16:26,710 Phew, 121 00:16:31,070 --> 00:16:33,050 crappy math. 122 00:16:33,570 --> 00:16:37,150 The timpanist gave us a paper to write leave without notice. 123 00:16:37,290 --> 00:16:38,290 That's a mess. 124 00:16:39,970 --> 00:16:42,030 I thought you had me offset. Here. 125 00:16:42,930 --> 00:16:45,330 Thank you very much. What does offset mean here? 126 00:16:45,710 --> 00:16:47,490 Just don't imagine so much. 127 00:16:47,850 --> 00:16:50,570 I don't answer to anyone. Yes, yes, it's okay. 128 00:16:56,570 --> 00:16:58,330 Look, that blind man there. 129 00:17:00,750 --> 00:17:01,830 Sure, I see. 130 00:17:02,670 --> 00:17:03,670 So what? 131 00:17:03,850 --> 00:17:04,970 What about that? 132 00:17:05,329 --> 00:17:07,010 I saw that one recently. 133 00:17:07,310 --> 00:17:11,150 There are many blind people in this city. Yes, but it's different. 134 00:17:11,790 --> 00:17:13,890 What do you think, is he unhappy? 135 00:17:14,510 --> 00:17:15,510 May be. 136 00:17:16,079 --> 00:17:18,380 Others are unhappy too. Are you? 137 00:17:20,839 --> 00:17:22,859 Now don't get too nervous. 138 00:17:23,099 --> 00:17:24,500 What does snapped mean? 139 00:17:25,619 --> 00:17:27,079 Are you coming to the disco tomorrow evening? 140 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,760 What if my parents don't mind? 141 00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:32,840 Nonsense. 142 00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:35,580 Twice a week you will finally be able to walk away. 143 00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:36,899 Let's see. 144 00:17:36,900 --> 00:17:37,960 I'll come. 145 00:17:39,080 --> 00:17:40,080 April 18th. 146 00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,540 Luther is very strange at the moment. 147 00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,020 We've known each other for over half a year year. 148 00:17:45,550 --> 00:17:49,570 At the beginning he was very funny and has a lot of fooling around, but now he is 149 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:50,970 became quiet and thoughtful. 150 00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:56,310 He likes me, I know that, but I am I don't know if I have something for him 151 00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:57,310 feel. 152 00:17:59,130 --> 00:18:03,750 I like to meet him, go with him him dance, but otherwise, if he me 153 00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:06,250 kisses, it's not much different than when Pope gives me a kiss. 154 00:18:07,230 --> 00:18:10,450 Of course this is all stupid maybe I like him after all. 155 00:18:11,410 --> 00:18:13,190 He probably wants to be with me sleep. 156 00:18:13,980 --> 00:18:15,360 That's why he's so weird. 157 00:18:16,340 --> 00:18:18,060 He senses that I don't want it. 158 00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:19,900 And he doesn't know what to do. 159 00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:23,560 Whether Ellen is right when she thinks I would have to go to a boy sometime 160 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:24,559 Bed? 161 00:18:24,560 --> 00:18:26,520 I have it twice more with Ellen made. 162 00:18:26,860 --> 00:18:28,480 But I find that idiotic. 163 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:30,500 It's much better alone. 164 00:18:31,260 --> 00:18:33,380 I feel like it every time happy. 165 00:18:34,660 --> 00:18:36,520 Should I sleep with Lothar? 166 00:18:37,060 --> 00:18:39,780 I don't know if that would be right. 167 00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:42,440 And I don't know... 168 00:18:42,790 --> 00:18:43,790 Do I want it? 169 00:19:45,570 --> 00:19:47,170 From the state of underdevelopment. 170 00:19:47,970 --> 00:19:48,970 Oh yes. 171 00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:51,070 Oh, then that's nice. 172 00:21:46,919 --> 00:21:51,520 Yes, yes, you are wonderful. 173 00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:34,360 November 5th. 174 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,860 Dear diary, I know that I love you like every year in the summer months 175 00:27:38,860 --> 00:27:39,860 have neglected. 176 00:27:40,100 --> 00:27:44,440 The holidays were like the last ones years, boring. At the campsite 177 00:27:44,440 --> 00:27:47,000 always the same people, the same Conversations. 178 00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:48,720 Nothing happened. 179 00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:53,580 Then came my hospital stay. It was downright shitty. 180 00:27:54,620 --> 00:27:56,700 Lothar was happy when he saw me saw again. 181 00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,820 I can't say if I like him missed. 182 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:10,200 I'm done. 183 00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:12,360 Don't pretend. Otherwise you'll lie down too into the stuff. 184 00:28:15,980 --> 00:28:17,020 Don't you want to throw? 185 00:28:17,900 --> 00:28:21,520 Afterward. I don't want to go that often today. I still have to be careful with my leg 186 00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:22,520 be. 187 00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:23,660 Sure, I understand. 188 00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:33,860 Sometimes I don't know if you enjoy it makes to go away with me. 189 00:28:34,180 --> 00:28:35,460 Sure, would I be here otherwise? 190 00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:37,900 Sure, but I mean... 191 00:28:38,350 --> 00:28:39,710 Why are you so dismissive? 192 00:28:39,950 --> 00:28:43,270 Why dismissive? I'm not Ellen, I'm just different. 193 00:28:43,510 --> 00:28:47,050 You can go away together without that you get knocked off right away or 194 00:28:47,050 --> 00:28:47,909 anything else. 195 00:28:47,910 --> 00:28:48,910 Now don't exaggerate. 196 00:28:51,710 --> 00:28:52,850 I like you very much. 197 00:29:22,030 --> 00:29:24,950 I remember you well. Oh, well exaggerate yourself. You know it 198 00:29:24,950 --> 00:29:25,990 After all, yes, right? 199 00:29:32,290 --> 00:29:33,290 Well, 200 00:29:40,610 --> 00:29:41,970 here I am. 201 00:29:42,210 --> 00:29:43,570 With you or with me? 202 00:29:44,470 --> 00:29:45,870 Probably both of us. 203 00:29:47,110 --> 00:29:48,790 Oh, you rascal. 204 00:29:51,340 --> 00:29:52,340 Thank you. 205 00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:22,240 I do not want that. 206 00:30:23,460 --> 00:30:25,200 But why? What's wrong with you? 207 00:30:35,100 --> 00:30:37,000 Don't worry about it. That goes away soon. 208 00:30:37,860 --> 00:30:39,080 Somebody understand women. 209 00:30:45,610 --> 00:30:47,950 What's wrong with you? Why are you asking? you like that? 210 00:30:48,170 --> 00:30:49,190 That's my business. 211 00:30:49,430 --> 00:30:50,690 Listen, you're 15. 212 00:30:50,910 --> 00:30:54,730 You are no longer a child. And Lothar too not. I think it's mean how you behave 213 00:30:54,730 --> 00:30:58,890 behave towards him. What does it mean here? common? Is it mean when you're with 214 00:30:58,890 --> 00:31:00,010 Boys won't go to bed? 215 00:31:00,270 --> 00:31:01,270 Not that. 216 00:31:01,630 --> 00:31:03,330 But you've known each other for so long. 217 00:31:03,590 --> 00:31:05,290 And he likes you, you know that. 218 00:31:05,590 --> 00:31:08,350 Either you break up with him or you are nicer to him. 219 00:31:09,430 --> 00:31:12,230 I think it doesn't work that way. He has that not deserved. 220 00:31:58,670 --> 00:31:59,670 What do you have? 221 00:31:59,710 --> 00:32:00,870 Wait a moment. 222 00:32:07,110 --> 00:32:08,950 Can I help you somehow? 223 00:32:09,670 --> 00:32:10,670 No. 224 00:32:10,910 --> 00:32:11,950 No, thank you, my child. 225 00:32:12,750 --> 00:32:14,010 Have you been standing here for a long time? 226 00:32:14,370 --> 00:32:18,070 Aren't you cold? It's as cold as always at this time of year. 227 00:32:18,730 --> 00:32:20,250 I stand here every evening. 228 00:32:20,590 --> 00:32:22,750 I'm being picked up. It doesn't take anymore long. 229 00:32:23,830 --> 00:32:25,670 Is everything really okay? 230 00:32:26,230 --> 00:32:27,230 So far. 231 00:32:28,010 --> 00:32:30,550 My sister is picking me up. She's coming from work. 232 00:32:31,530 --> 00:32:32,530 Thank you, my child. 233 00:32:33,730 --> 00:32:34,730 Good night. 234 00:32:36,010 --> 00:32:37,010 Yes. 235 00:32:42,870 --> 00:32:44,290 What did you want from him? 236 00:32:44,730 --> 00:32:46,650 I know he's unhappy. 237 00:32:47,190 --> 00:32:48,230 That's all. 238 00:32:48,510 --> 00:32:49,510 OK. 239 00:33:17,100 --> 00:33:19,200 I'm sorry about earlier. 240 00:33:19,740 --> 00:33:21,220 What am I sorry for? 241 00:33:21,660 --> 00:33:23,220 Please don't be angry anymore. 242 00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:24,920 OK. 243 00:33:30,220 --> 00:33:31,220 Come in with me. 244 00:33:31,900 --> 00:33:32,940 If you want it. 245 00:33:49,200 --> 00:33:50,440 We have to be quiet. 246 00:38:04,040 --> 00:38:05,140 Lothar is happy. 247 00:38:05,620 --> 00:38:09,060 I didn't feel much, but it made me happy. 248 00:38:10,420 --> 00:38:12,680 Whether I can make someone else happy wanted? 249 00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:14,620 I don't know it. 250 00:38:17,820 --> 00:38:19,880 Is the blind man already at home? 251 00:38:35,580 --> 00:38:36,379 Friday, 7th 252 00:38:36,380 --> 00:38:38,820 November. Went shopping with mom. 253 00:38:39,140 --> 00:38:42,380 We rarely go shopping together. This has its reason. 254 00:38:42,940 --> 00:38:45,360 Mom rushes through the shops and can can't get enough. 255 00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:48,820 Afterwards she is completely exhausted and have to go to a café first 256 00:38:48,820 --> 00:38:51,420 recover. With cake and whipped cream. 257 00:38:52,020 --> 00:38:53,720 But I wanted to talk to her today. 258 00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:55,880 About my problems with Lothar. 259 00:38:56,240 --> 00:38:58,560 There is no opportunity at home result. 260 00:39:35,020 --> 00:39:37,960 I think about it all the time Shoes weren't too expensive after all. 261 00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:40,400 165 marks. 262 00:39:40,860 --> 00:39:42,440 We should have looked around again should. 263 00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:44,960 I would probably have it somewhere else get cheaper. 264 00:39:45,240 --> 00:39:49,680 Or what do you mean? Listen, mom, I... I want something with you 265 00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:51,420 But what, my darling? 266 00:39:51,780 --> 00:39:52,780 Do you need money? 267 00:39:52,980 --> 00:39:54,920 You could have something for yourself today too can buy. 268 00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:57,760 No, Mom, that's not the point. 269 00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:00,160 It's about Lothar. 270 00:40:00,380 --> 00:40:03,040 Oh, Lothar. You'll still meet him and to. 271 00:40:04,460 --> 00:40:06,440 You should have it for us in the evening invite. 272 00:40:07,100 --> 00:40:09,640 Speaking of inviting. Oh dear heavens. 273 00:40:09,940 --> 00:40:13,260 I forgot the most important thing. We need a new tablecloth. 274 00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:15,440 Trouble comes to visit on the weekend. 275 00:40:16,220 --> 00:40:19,340 We definitely have to do it again later to the Kapphaus and a tablecloth 276 00:40:19,340 --> 00:40:20,340 get. 277 00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:25,820 Do you mean that a boy of one Girl is disappointed when she... I 278 00:40:25,820 --> 00:40:27,980 mean if she doesn't do what he wants? 279 00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:31,940 You can't think too much about it think, my darling. It'll be fine 280 00:40:32,700 --> 00:40:35,580 If only I knew what to do with the Bergers could present this time. 281 00:40:36,820 --> 00:40:40,360 He's still going, but she's something funny. You never know with her. 282 00:40:43,780 --> 00:40:45,120 What is? What do you have? 283 00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:47,700 I'll be right back. 284 00:41:00,100 --> 00:41:02,920 If you want to get to the other side, I would like to help you. 285 00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:04,960 Yes, thanks. 286 00:41:05,820 --> 00:41:06,820 That is very nice. 287 00:41:17,960 --> 00:41:19,080 Thank you, my child. 288 00:41:19,620 --> 00:41:21,800 We've met before, haven't we true? 289 00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:23,460 Yes, how do you know that? 290 00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:27,900 Oh, I have a good memory for Voices. There are some that you want 291 00:41:27,900 --> 00:41:28,900 never hear again. 292 00:41:29,100 --> 00:41:31,060 others to be happy about. 293 00:41:31,900 --> 00:41:33,760 I wish you good luck, my child. 294 00:42:00,300 --> 00:42:02,240 I feel like you're a today little confused. 295 00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:07,380 So, you wanted to tell me something. No, forget it. It's nothing. 296 00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:29,200 Saturday, 15. 297 00:42:29,220 --> 00:42:30,750 September. Party at Ellen's. 298 00:42:31,270 --> 00:42:35,070 Your parents went on vacation. It is the first time that Ellen is alone 299 00:42:35,070 --> 00:42:36,070 was allowed to stay here. 300 00:42:36,290 --> 00:42:38,730 I feel like she's using it shameless. 301 00:42:39,050 --> 00:42:40,330 But that's their business. 302 00:42:40,950 --> 00:42:43,930 It's a vacation for my parents and me canceled this year. 303 00:42:44,290 --> 00:42:45,510 Dad is unemployed. 304 00:42:45,730 --> 00:42:47,290 His company went bankrupt. 305 00:42:47,950 --> 00:42:50,810 For me it wasn't that bad. Finally no camping. 306 00:42:51,230 --> 00:42:53,210 I have met Lothar more often hit. 307 00:42:53,630 --> 00:42:55,510 I have been with him a few times slept. 308 00:42:56,090 --> 00:42:57,550 It didn't give me much. 309 00:42:58,460 --> 00:43:00,600 Somehow I thought of it all differently presented. 310 00:43:01,580 --> 00:43:03,580 I probably just did it for his sake done. 311 00:43:04,100 --> 00:43:07,900 At first he was happy, but now he has changed. 312 00:43:08,220 --> 00:43:10,020 A little colder towards me. 313 00:43:11,060 --> 00:43:12,660 Still, I feel happy. 314 00:43:13,120 --> 00:43:14,420 Not because of Lothar. 315 00:43:14,780 --> 00:43:16,640 I've been 16 for 14 days. 316 00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:18,260 Time is running. 317 00:43:18,700 --> 00:43:20,840 According to paper, I'll soon be an adult. 318 00:43:26,540 --> 00:43:29,950 Hey, what's wrong? Do you want to be here in yours? Fall asleep in the corner? Cheers to you. 319 00:43:30,370 --> 00:43:33,430 I want a cheeky number with you throw. You find yourself comfortable 320 00:43:33,430 --> 00:43:35,370 irresistible. Clear. 321 00:43:35,730 --> 00:43:38,850 I break the hearts of the proudest women. Yours too. 322 00:43:41,470 --> 00:43:42,470 Wait. 323 00:43:45,710 --> 00:43:46,110 Like 324 00:43:46,110 --> 00:43:54,370 comes 325 00:43:54,370 --> 00:43:56,370 it's that you're seen like that at festivals like this rarely sees? 326 00:43:56,670 --> 00:43:58,130 I'm not that into partying. 327 00:43:58,390 --> 00:44:00,870 Oh, what are you into then? On you definitely not. 328 00:44:05,510 --> 00:44:06,510 Oh, 329 00:44:12,830 --> 00:44:19,510 You're pretty awesome, you two. 330 00:44:19,770 --> 00:44:20,769 Isn't it you? 331 00:44:20,770 --> 00:44:21,790 None of your business. 332 00:44:25,040 --> 00:44:27,460 Bet it's definitely not anymore innocent. Don't get cheeky. 333 00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:37,240 Don't you think it's like that down here? many people are? 334 00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:39,120 Okay, let's go upstairs. 335 00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:40,520 Come on, come on. 336 00:44:40,720 --> 00:44:42,080 You don't have to tell me twice. 337 00:44:49,260 --> 00:44:50,420 Nightingale, I'm listening to you. 338 00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:52,360 I don't like dancing anymore. 339 00:44:52,660 --> 00:44:54,760 Hey, what's this? The number becomes brought to an end. 340 00:45:05,100 --> 00:45:10,080 Don't you want to do that too? Look at the opera floor? Oh, that 341 00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:12,460 So, what are you waiting for? 342 00:45:12,700 --> 00:45:13,840 But you're not my type. 343 00:45:14,840 --> 00:45:15,840 Nice shit. 344 00:45:16,420 --> 00:45:17,420 What's wrong with you? 345 00:45:18,010 --> 00:45:20,090 Or are you more into John Travolta? 346 00:45:20,990 --> 00:45:23,150 No, Ilya Richter does it too. 347 00:45:34,110 --> 00:45:35,210 Thank you, lady. 348 00:45:35,790 --> 00:45:36,790 Oh dear. 349 00:45:46,030 --> 00:45:47,510 I find it really boring down here. 350 00:45:47,950 --> 00:45:49,910 I find it boring at all. 351 00:45:50,670 --> 00:45:51,670 Do you feel like? 352 00:45:53,690 --> 00:45:55,290 We haven't been there for a long time together. 353 00:45:55,850 --> 00:45:58,150 And now you probably want us to do here? 354 00:45:59,670 --> 00:46:00,830 No, not down here. 355 00:46:01,310 --> 00:46:04,870 I don't want to be here at all. And Besides, I can't do it on command. 356 00:46:06,070 --> 00:46:07,890 Fine, then not. 357 00:46:12,370 --> 00:46:13,630 Well, all alone? 358 00:46:41,049 --> 00:46:42,049 Here. Thanks. 359 00:46:43,710 --> 00:46:46,110 With you it feels like you were never at a party. 360 00:46:46,910 --> 00:46:48,610 Definitely not on one of these. 361 00:46:48,990 --> 00:46:50,010 Hey, what's going on? 362 00:46:50,250 --> 00:46:51,250 Are you 13? 363 00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:55,680 We're not in kindergarten here. At A party like this is about other things. 364 00:46:55,960 --> 00:46:59,240 If you don't know this, you should not let you be invited. 365 00:47:00,180 --> 00:47:03,580 What do you think, Nina? We don't want to go upstairs? 366 00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:04,920 Yes, come. 367 00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:10,540 Up, up and away. 368 00:47:12,960 --> 00:47:16,980 What is it, sister? I am like that to you unsympathetic? That's not the point. 369 00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:18,198 Oh no? 370 00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:19,200 Stop it. 371 00:47:19,660 --> 00:47:21,040 I think that's silly. 372 00:47:24,690 --> 00:47:26,990 Actually. What do you think they are doing? do above? 373 00:47:27,490 --> 00:47:28,490 I don't care. 374 00:47:29,310 --> 00:47:30,850 Don't we want to take a look? 375 00:47:31,130 --> 00:47:33,350 No. So you're a coward too. 376 00:47:33,650 --> 00:47:34,910 I'm not a coward. 377 00:47:35,150 --> 00:47:38,670 All right, then let's take a look. This It costs nothing and no one hurts you. 378 00:47:41,530 --> 00:47:42,530 Come on. 379 00:47:44,090 --> 00:47:45,090 So what. 380 00:47:50,090 --> 00:47:51,330 So, let's try it here. 381 00:48:03,330 --> 00:48:05,430 Don't worry, darling, I've got this seen several times. 382 00:48:07,350 --> 00:48:08,350 Yes, 383 00:48:08,990 --> 00:48:09,990 yes, it's okay. 384 00:48:10,270 --> 00:48:12,130 And make sure everything goes smoothly. 385 00:48:13,530 --> 00:48:14,530 A gift, my boy. 386 00:48:17,120 --> 00:48:17,839 We want? 387 00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:22,220 No, I don't like it anymore. Are you kidding me? Are you serious when you say that. Who A says, B must also say. 388 00:48:22,640 --> 00:48:23,640 Come on, come on. 389 00:48:44,400 --> 00:48:45,920 Hello, the water is nice too warm? 390 00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:47,540 Sure, and everything else too. 391 00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:50,660 Make yourself comfortable. Somewhere you will find her a place. 392 00:48:50,940 --> 00:48:51,940 But always. 393 00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:53,440 What's that supposed to mean? 394 00:48:53,720 --> 00:48:55,860 Why do you want to run away? Let me go. 395 00:48:56,160 --> 00:48:59,180 What are you thinking? Do you think me? serve myself? You should me 396 00:48:59,180 --> 00:49:00,180 let go. 397 00:49:02,100 --> 00:49:03,100 Brothers Goat. 398 00:49:53,520 --> 00:49:57,460 I'll make you so wet that it really slips afterwards. 399 00:50:25,930 --> 00:50:27,270 Then drink my lout, Lord Paulerman. 400 00:50:31,930 --> 00:50:33,230 And it has a hole. 401 00:50:33,830 --> 00:50:36,890 Oh, you'd like four in there Go on vacation for weeks. 402 00:50:52,050 --> 00:50:53,530 You are gifted. 403 00:50:54,350 --> 00:50:55,550 Really talented. 404 00:51:46,920 --> 00:51:47,920 Now you're going to lick it. 405 00:51:56,540 --> 00:51:59,120 You have to really go in, otherwise I'll feel it not you. 406 00:52:09,520 --> 00:52:11,520 Yes, that's right. 407 00:52:19,660 --> 00:52:20,660 Here we go. 408 00:52:22,380 --> 00:52:23,980 This is how I get deep into you. 409 00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:16,920 It's coming to me soon. 410 00:53:18,540 --> 00:53:20,520 Firmly. Very firmly. 411 00:53:21,160 --> 00:53:22,160 Yes. 412 00:53:31,620 --> 00:53:33,560 Now. Yes, now. 413 00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:39,360 Taste my precious juice. 414 00:53:40,160 --> 00:53:41,160 Yes. 415 00:53:42,260 --> 00:53:43,420 Take plenty. 416 00:54:08,970 --> 00:54:09,968 Just slowly. 417 00:54:09,970 --> 00:54:11,130 Always take it easy. 418 00:54:11,750 --> 00:54:13,910 You should enjoy things like this. 419 00:54:47,950 --> 00:54:50,470 Your delicate, soft skin, mine Sweetheart. 420 00:55:21,230 --> 00:55:22,230 Push me. 421 00:55:41,130 --> 00:55:42,490 Finally push me. 422 00:55:42,950 --> 00:55:45,990 Slow. I want some more now sip your juice. 423 00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:52,240 You may be a foodie. 424 00:56:14,840 --> 00:56:16,540 Alright, enough of the tidbits. 425 00:56:16,940 --> 00:56:17,940 Here we go. 426 00:56:44,180 --> 00:56:47,440 Hello, friends. There will be another one here strong cock needed? Of course, 427 00:56:47,440 --> 00:56:49,260 yes. Come on, jump on it. 428 00:56:53,140 --> 00:56:55,740 So, now into the water. 429 00:56:59,430 --> 00:57:03,030 If the others fail, he can good Pitt still. You can feel that 430 00:57:03,030 --> 00:57:04,030 hopefully. And? 431 00:57:04,230 --> 00:57:05,230 Oh, 432 00:57:06,730 --> 00:57:11,210 you have a magnificent strap. This I want to think so. I have every one for him 433 00:57:11,210 --> 00:57:13,330 Lots of international thank you letters received. 434 00:58:07,370 --> 00:58:11,330 You're a force, boy. What believe you, how my throat needs that? 435 00:58:32,190 --> 00:58:35,690 I'm sorry, darling. I can do it no longer hold. 436 00:58:36,010 --> 00:58:37,010 I feel... 437 00:58:42,770 --> 00:58:46,370 Too bad. No worries. I'll catch you again later. 438 01:00:16,650 --> 01:00:17,650 Commands, pawn! 439 01:01:06,000 --> 01:01:07,000 Not so tight anymore. 440 01:01:07,420 --> 01:01:09,220 Remember, the boy has a hard time worked. 441 01:01:13,560 --> 01:01:14,920 It comes to me too. 442 01:02:33,640 --> 01:02:36,040 new year has started. Thank God. 443 01:02:36,480 --> 01:02:38,500 I'll be 17 in a few months. 444 01:02:39,460 --> 01:02:43,380 17! I don't know why I care so much depend on my getting older. 445 01:02:44,260 --> 01:02:47,080 Probably because I hope so some things will change. 446 01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:48,520 From year to year. 447 01:02:49,400 --> 01:02:51,120 There's nothing exciting at the moment. 448 01:02:51,920 --> 01:02:55,280 I've had Lothar and Ellen since the party tried to avoid as much as possible. 449 01:02:56,040 --> 01:02:58,440 This whole thing got me back then disgusted. 450 01:02:59,120 --> 01:03:02,700 On the way home I always re-imagined how they did it 451 01:03:02,700 --> 01:03:07,540 drive. I wanted the pictures and that Repress thoughts, but it's mine 452 01:03:07,540 --> 01:03:08,540 not successful. 453 01:03:08,780 --> 01:03:10,520 I was ashamed at home. 454 01:03:11,360 --> 01:03:13,560 Still, I did that night masturbates. 455 01:03:15,660 --> 01:03:17,680 I believe that I am not a prude. 456 01:03:18,360 --> 01:03:21,220 I know that I long for this, to love physically. 457 01:03:21,820 --> 01:03:23,760 But I don't want to do it under duress. 458 01:03:24,020 --> 01:03:26,600 It has to come by itself. It has to happen result. 459 01:03:27,560 --> 01:03:31,060 I believe that it can only be done with real ones feelings can be beautiful. 460 01:03:31,820 --> 01:03:33,180 I believe in love. 461 01:03:41,800 --> 01:03:44,620 Mommy, Mommy, how do I look? 462 01:03:44,860 --> 01:03:45,860 So what's going on? 463 01:03:46,160 --> 01:03:47,720 Tell me, how do I look? 464 01:03:48,680 --> 01:03:49,680 Great, yes. 465 01:03:49,780 --> 01:03:52,900 But what have you got? That's how you are excited. 466 01:03:54,020 --> 01:03:58,460 You really think I'm good looks? Oh mom, that's how I am 467 01:04:00,330 --> 01:04:02,830 It's wonderful. He is wonderful. 468 01:04:03,150 --> 01:04:07,310 Yesterday, November 10th, I met Holger met. My feelings are complete 469 01:04:07,310 --> 01:04:11,410 messed up. I don't know if I should laugh or cry. I just know 470 01:04:11,490 --> 01:04:12,490 that I am happy. 471 01:04:12,610 --> 01:04:17,510 I always want to see him, always want to be with him. He is what I mean 472 01:04:17,510 --> 01:04:21,490 probably dreamed about all the time have. He looks so tender, he is like that 473 01:04:21,490 --> 01:04:25,850 calm. In his presence I feel saved me. I like him very much. 474 01:04:25,850 --> 01:04:27,570 think I love him. Hello? 475 01:04:29,060 --> 01:04:30,060 Where do we want to go? 476 01:04:30,760 --> 01:04:32,440 I don't know, somewhere. 477 01:04:32,700 --> 01:04:33,860 Do you want to show me Hamburg? 478 01:04:34,160 --> 01:04:35,160 Yes gladly. 479 01:04:35,320 --> 01:04:36,320 Agreed. 480 01:04:38,680 --> 01:04:42,040 I could never describe this feeling can if I didn't meet him 481 01:04:42,040 --> 01:04:46,200 would have. The first moment was when if it would tear my chest apart. 482 01:04:46,520 --> 01:04:47,700 He was just there. 483 01:04:48,260 --> 01:04:49,540 It was just there. 484 01:04:52,200 --> 01:04:56,000 I sat in the little café where I was with I was with my mom after shopping. 485 01:04:56,560 --> 01:04:58,180 I don't know why I'm there went. 486 01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:01,400 Maybe I was hoping for the blind man to see again. 487 01:05:13,140 --> 01:05:14,920 Excuse me, your purse is fallen below. 488 01:05:18,000 --> 01:05:19,000 Can I sit down? 489 01:05:19,500 --> 01:05:22,120 But I don't want you to feel harassed by me. 490 01:05:23,160 --> 01:05:24,160 Yes, please. 491 01:05:30,320 --> 01:05:34,140 I don't remember what he said. All I know is that he was there. Quite 492 01:05:34,140 --> 01:05:35,140 just there. 493 01:05:35,580 --> 01:05:39,640 It's like being at high altitude Ears close. You don't hear any noise 494 01:05:39,740 --> 01:05:43,060 No more other people talking. Man even forgets the words that one 495 01:05:43,060 --> 01:05:47,140 concern. You feel so small and so free at the same time. 496 01:05:47,520 --> 01:05:51,420 I only knew that his name was Holger. And I didn't care that he probably 497 01:05:51,420 --> 01:05:52,480 was much older. 498 01:07:43,820 --> 01:07:45,220 Look, that blind man there. 499 01:07:45,960 --> 01:07:47,060 Yes, what about him? 500 01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:49,280 I've had it several times hit. 501 01:07:49,580 --> 01:07:51,320 So, do you feel sorry for him? 502 01:07:53,320 --> 01:07:56,720 Yes, I think so. I imagine imagine how unhappy he must be. 503 01:07:57,260 --> 01:07:58,420 Do you think you can do that? 504 01:07:58,680 --> 01:08:00,380 Yes, because I'm so happy. 505 01:08:31,370 --> 01:08:33,490 Are you sure your parents aren't come? 506 01:08:33,830 --> 01:08:34,970 Yes, definitely. 507 01:08:35,649 --> 01:08:37,250 You wanted me to come with you. 508 01:08:37,630 --> 01:08:39,770 Yes, I wanted it. Didn't you want it? 509 01:08:40,390 --> 01:08:42,470 Why do you ask? 510 01:08:45,490 --> 01:08:47,910 There's something you don't know yet. 511 01:08:50,450 --> 01:08:54,569 I just couldn't tell you yet say. Don't talk. 512 01:08:55,750 --> 01:08:57,490 I don't want anything but you. 513 01:08:58,490 --> 01:09:01,000 You... I want you to love me. 514 01:09:26,920 --> 01:09:29,439 What this love has given us 515 01:09:30,140 --> 01:09:36,920 what they made of our lives, the Answer, when will she? 516 01:09:36,920 --> 01:09:37,920 reach us? 517 01:09:42,760 --> 01:09:49,680 The caresses of the embrace, Pain more bitter 518 01:09:49,680 --> 01:09:54,880 Experiences, memories of them become depart from us. 519 01:10:07,190 --> 01:10:09,270 Yes. Yes. 520 01:10:09,870 --> 01:10:11,430 Yes. Yes. 521 01:10:11,910 --> 01:10:12,910 Yes. 522 01:10:13,710 --> 01:10:14,710 Yes. 523 01:10:40,830 --> 01:10:47,730 The hope that lived in us, that Happiness after you 524 01:10:47,730 --> 01:10:52,890 so striving is through our fault everything is now torn apart. 525 01:10:58,570 --> 01:11:04,690 The love we are committed to, what is at the end of her 526 01:11:04,690 --> 01:11:09,290 stayed? She was over, barely had she started. 527 01:11:20,110 --> 01:11:27,010 You are so lucky for us. 528 01:11:32,019 --> 01:11:36,520 Hatla, the desire to see you again experience. 529 01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:44,580 Yangla, which is the bond of love torn. 530 01:11:48,200 --> 01:11:52,740 Hatla, because we're both separating have to. 531 01:11:56,650 --> 01:12:01,130 Young love, we have to part go. 532 01:12:03,070 --> 01:12:09,290 Young love, we will never meet again see. 533 01:12:12,330 --> 01:12:16,250 Young love, but we can... 534 01:12:31,660 --> 01:12:34,080 You gave us so much happiness. 535 01:12:37,360 --> 01:12:41,560 Oh sure, I want that again. 536 01:14:03,080 --> 01:14:06,560 When love is something you feel can, then I met her. 537 01:14:06,780 --> 01:14:08,960 How nonsensical all the problems seemed. 538 01:14:09,580 --> 01:14:11,420 Ellen, Lothar, they were far away. 539 01:14:11,820 --> 01:14:14,520 I was no longer 17, Holger was no longer 38. 540 01:14:15,160 --> 01:14:16,580 We were both the same. 541 01:14:16,920 --> 01:14:20,140 A unity, connected deep within us inside. 542 01:14:20,640 --> 01:14:22,280 This night was not a night. 543 01:14:22,520 --> 01:14:23,820 She wasn't cold. 544 01:14:24,060 --> 01:14:28,660 If a thousand suns can be so warm, like a hug through love 545 01:14:28,660 --> 01:14:32,300 was born, then this can Universe never expire. 546 01:14:33,040 --> 01:14:36,940 I believe that he was mine from the beginning wanted to say that he was back from Hamburg 547 01:14:36,940 --> 01:14:37,940 had to leave. 548 01:14:38,120 --> 01:14:42,580 His stay here was short Time, but I probably wanted it 549 01:14:42,580 --> 01:14:43,580 don't hear. 550 01:14:44,000 --> 01:14:47,580 I didn't cry. I was too not empty-inner, like the in 551 01:14:47,580 --> 01:14:48,580 kitsch novels. 552 01:14:48,880 --> 01:14:51,680 I was just quiet, not even once unhappy. 553 01:14:52,040 --> 01:14:53,680 I just couldn't believe it. 554 01:14:54,320 --> 01:14:56,880 Holger didn't want me to Say goodbye to the train station. 555 01:14:57,240 --> 01:15:00,680 He said, whoever sees each other when saying goodbye, believes that the other will come back 556 01:15:00,680 --> 01:15:02,850 will. But it won't be like that. 557 01:15:03,550 --> 01:15:04,550 Singapore is far. 558 01:15:04,910 --> 01:15:07,330 A train is not a station Distance. 559 01:15:07,710 --> 01:15:11,750 But the plane he gets on is the final consequence. 560 01:15:12,030 --> 01:15:14,190 Why does love exist if it hurts so much? does? 561 01:15:14,530 --> 01:15:17,210 Why is everything over before it? started? 562 01:15:17,710 --> 01:15:19,970 Holger, I know that I will never love you will see you again. 563 01:15:20,390 --> 01:15:21,630 What am I supposed to do? 564 01:15:22,010 --> 01:15:23,650 It's all so pointless. 565 01:15:24,070 --> 01:15:25,890 What should I write in my diary? 566 01:15:26,650 --> 01:15:31,280 November 20th I lost what the most important thing in the world to me so far 567 01:15:31,280 --> 01:15:34,040 was. I am 17 years old and unhappy. 568 01:15:34,340 --> 01:15:37,340 What else should I write? It is like that pointless. 569 01:15:43,000 --> 01:15:44,000 Oh, 570 01:15:48,740 --> 01:15:53,040 Please excuse. Hello, who do we have there? 571 01:15:55,340 --> 01:15:56,840 What's wrong, my child? 572 01:15:57,340 --> 01:15:58,640 I hardly recognize you. 573 01:15:58,960 --> 01:16:01,580 It's nothing, I'm sorry. Anna? Please forgive me. 574 01:16:01,840 --> 01:16:05,860 You know, that's a voice about that you are happy. I hope you're well 575 01:16:05,860 --> 01:16:08,640 good. Oh yes, I can travel. 576 01:16:09,240 --> 01:16:11,140 I'm returning to my homeland. 577 01:16:11,460 --> 01:16:13,660 That is nice. I wish you a lot Happiness. 578 01:16:13,900 --> 01:16:14,900 Thank you, my child. 579 01:16:15,580 --> 01:16:16,580 Goodbye. 580 01:16:18,580 --> 01:16:20,800 That will hardly be possible. 581 01:16:33,610 --> 01:16:38,010 I'm unhappy, crazy unhappy. He, the blind one who sees, is 582 01:16:38,010 --> 01:16:39,750 Lucky ones. It's crazy. 583 01:16:40,170 --> 01:16:41,390 What is happy? 584 01:16:41,790 --> 01:16:43,170 What is unhappy? 585 01:16:43,570 --> 01:16:44,910 Who determines that? 586 01:16:45,350 --> 01:16:46,470 I'm 17. 587 01:16:47,090 --> 01:16:49,790 I'm not Ellen. I'm not Lothar. 588 01:16:50,190 --> 01:16:51,210 I live. 589 01:16:51,450 --> 01:16:52,530 I'm 17. 590 01:16:53,350 --> 01:16:54,350 I see. 591 01:16:54,630 --> 01:16:55,810 I'm not blind. 592 01:16:56,190 --> 01:16:57,190 I feel. 593 01:16:57,550 --> 01:17:00,070 What is a day? What is a week? 594 01:17:00,310 --> 01:17:01,450 What is love? 595 01:17:02,080 --> 01:17:03,080 She is life. 596 01:17:03,420 --> 01:17:06,500 But life has many days. Many days. 597 01:17:07,180 --> 01:17:08,660 One of them starts today.